Once Upon A Time There Was a Magical Wedding....And Beatrice's Hat.

It's been a while since I've blogged but I had to come back to write about something I think is quite important but is failing receive the recognition it deserves. I mean, doesn't anyone want to discuss the Royal Wedding?? The lack of attention for this event is just horrible and I won't stand for it.

I lead with sarcasm because I feel like a cliche and it's a defense mechanism. I'm missing-in-action in the blogosphere and come back to write about the very topic you can read about on 15 million other sites. Wow, Lindsay, how original of you.

I'm a little slow. Sure, I've been following all the news and anxiously awaited this morning's event, but I think I entered full obssession after the wedding, when others' interests climaxed and naturally started to wane. For them, it was the perfect conclusion to months of anticipation.


(AP PHOTO/DOMINIC LIPINSKI)


Not for me.

I can't stop reading fashion blogs. I can't stop looking at event timelines that recap the very order of events that I already watched 13 hours ago. And, I want a fancy hat on my head, like, now.

Forget the happy couple, here's how it all went down for me.

I Hear Ya, Man...

A lot of people are posting this video right now but, guess what, so am I.

Not only is this cute, but it is also the perfect example of what it was like living with my host family when I studied abroad in Italy. We were always in the kitchen, they were loud, I couldn't understand any of it, and there were a ton of hand gestures and body movements. I wish I could say that, unlike in the video, they were always fully clothed, but some of my host mom's low-cut tops could perhaps prove me to be a liar. Also, like in the video, just when I would think they were about to blow up with anger, one of them would laugh. It turns out angry-sounding-hand-gesturing-Italian is just the same as joke-telling-friendly-hand-gesturing-Italian. Thank you, twin babies, for the bizzarro nostalgia. I really wish I know what you were saying because it sounds like it was hilarious. And, I miss you Carla, mia mama italiana.

It Just Ain't Right

So here's a list of pet peeves that you may think (ok, I may think) but you can't really complain about them because they are small fish in a big pond of problems that includes homelessness, the education system, etc. you feel petty. (ok, I feel petty)

But, sometimes you have to air your grievances before they build up because, "it just ain't right."

It just ain't right...

• that people will take the time to back into a parking spot in a parking deck when there is clearly a line of cars waiting to also score the opportunity to find a parking spot. It's like rubbing it in the waiting drivers' faces. "Hey, look at me. I found a spot. And, I know you need to find a spot and get going too but I'm going to stop, go in reverse, maneuver unnecessarily and back into this spot because, well, I can."

Royal Refrigerators and Baby Catapults...You Heard Me.

Today, my friend Ana Cris alerted me to an amazing find on everyone's favorite, http://www.someecards.com/. Well, they aren't actually responsible for the actual product, but they did bring it to my attention "across the pond."

Renovating your kitchen? Why not try the commemorative Prince William and Kate Middleton GE Refrigerator. Because, there's nothing you want more than to go for a midnight snack and have these royal mugs staring back at you. Unless your name is Prince William or Kate Middleton, you should NOT have this in your home. Even then, it is totally not acceptable. (Although, I do think this opens the door - pun intended - to an intriguing market of custom-photography large appliances...)

This royal refrigerator made me wonder what other kinds of crazy crap I could find out there...that's what the Internet is for, right? If you're looking for a good time, Google "bizzare gift ideas." (Do not Google "for a good time"). You can kill a solid 20 minutes (or in my case, an episode of The Middle....middle.*) looking at this crazyass stuff.

*That was a The Middle joke. If you don't watch The Middle, then it is just tiny repetition.

Exhibit A - Baby Catapults.

So, I actually could see this being totally amusing. It looks way more fun than typical baby shower games. But still, who initially came up with this concept and who purchases it? Even more amusing than the actual product is the description. Thank you Far Fetched Gifts for the entertainment.

I'd Like to Thank The Academy....and Double-Stick Tape

Unfortunately, I don't have the time this evening to give an editorial recap of last night's Oscar festivities...I know, you're crushed. That'll come tomorrow. But the highlight of a otherwise fairly uneventful evening was, as usual, the fashion. Here are some of the gowns that caught my eye. Even I was surprised by some of my selections. I mean, Mandy Moore and Celine Dion? What is this, 1998?

 Well done, Ladies.Well done.                                            


Cate Blanchett in Givenchy Couture
(Photo Credit: AP Photo/Matt Sayles)

 


Hailee Steinfeld in Marchesa

(Photo Credit: Kirk McKoy/Los Angeles Times/MCT)

 


Sandra Bullock in Vera Wang
(Photo Credit: AP Photo/Chris Pizzello)




Celine Dion in Giorgio Armani Prive
(Photo Credit: Jason Merritt/Getty Images)



Worst Business Model Ever

It's Girl Scout Cookies season. Those vest-wearing saleswomen are everywhere...door-to-door, outside Walmart, inside the mall. As a good citizen who wishes to encourage the successful ventures of our community's youth, I've already had my fair share of Thin Mints with a side of Samoas. It's so hard to say no to Girl Scout Cookies when you know that they won't be around forever. You always want what you can't have. Seeing Tagalongs, Thin Mints, Samoas, Do-si-dos (Really? Those continue to make the cut?), and the newly introduced (to me) Dulce De Leche cookies in the break room at work reminded me of a segment from SNL Weekend Update analyzing the Girl Scout Cookies model.

Enjoy.

 

Five Things I'm Loving Right Now

1. Tea and Travel: Mutually Exclusive No More

My love of tea is no secret. But, as I was in a tea store (which should be a more commonly found establishment), I thought, "I wish someone would create a travel mug with a built-in tea infuser so you could have the deliciousness of loose tea on the go. I've never seen such a thing. I will invent it!" Well, guess what??? I didn't. Because someone else did. While I was perusing the aisles of my local Crate and Barrel, I spotted it. The coveted (by me) tea infuser travel mug. The one pictured at the right is the same one I bought! Well, not literally the exact same one, obviously. This one is by Aladdin. I can now enjoy my delicious coconut ginger tea on the way to work. Speaking of Coconut....

2. The Other White Meat

(Get it? Because the edible part of a coconut is called the meat? And, it's white? I was pretty proud of that.)

I used to hate coconut. Or, at least I thought I did. Sort of how I thought I hated guacamole...boy, was I taking crazy pills. That mess is delicious.